Relationships are hard, but worth it!

I have beening thinking a lot about this recently, and have to say that relationships are hard, the good ones, that is--the ones worth keeping. I think anyone would admit to that. Casual aquaintenances, etc., are trival as there is little invested in it. Deep, long, meaningful relationships are hard.

Why? The reason is simple. When you put two people together who are fully capable of being selfish, self-centred, inconsiderate, and so on--basically sinful--you are going to have problems. For example, you can spend so much time on yourself because you want to do your own thing that your spouse, children and friends get none of your time. You can be so selfish that you talk for yourself more and give nothing to those around you. You can be so inconsiderate as to not clean up after yourself even though your spouse needs it of you. You can be so sensitive as to get upset anytime someone points out an issue in something you do, even when they aren't mad. You can be...well, you get my drift.

These challenges in relationships, especially marriages, are well known and discussed on TV(especially talk shows), books, etc. The occur between couples, friends, family members...even countries.

The problem is we as sinful creatures, each of us with hearts all to capable of doing wrong (Jeremiah 17:9) we are in for strife...guarenteed.

But it isn't hopeless. I have found my relationships growing signifcantly over the last while more to the place I'd like them to be. What has made the difference? Changes in me. I'm not saying that because I'm the cause of all the problems. Absolutely not. Relationships are a "two way street" as many have said. It takes "two to tango". (Okay, enough sayings :-) ).

The thing, though, to do if you want your relationships to change isn't to try to change the other person. It is to change yourself. You are the only person, in a relationship, you can change. If you are waiting for the other person to change to make things better, you will probably be waiting a very long time, if not forever. However, if you are willing to make that step forward, to change your approach, your reactions, your thinking...your heart...you will see your relationships grow. Give more of yourself, think more of others.

Now, granted, if the other person wants nothing to do with making things better despite what you do, then there will continue to be problems. But such a situation isn't a relationship as it is one-sided. In the vast majority of cases, however--as it is in mine--both sides want the best. So the efforts of one can grow the relationship as the other sees the consistent, genuine growth, and responds.

Realizes this applies to relationships in trouble or relationships that are good. Relationships should always be growing, improving--just like we should be ourselves. No relationship is perfect. It can be good, but it won't be perfect. Always seek to see it become better. That is my hearts desire in my life, more now than ever.

If you are growing, aiming to be less selfish, more giving, more other-centric, and so on you can see your relationships grown and blossom. I've found that in my own life. I'm happy with the direction my relationships have been taking lately. And I attribute it to the growth and changes God has been bringing out in me.

Not sure what to do yourself? Turn to Him who made you. He understands you. He can grant you the wisdom and understand to know what to do. He has, thankfully, done for so me--despite my being a slow learner :-)

But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. - James 1:5